A single night....

One more short story by Rabindranath Tagore...A single night.

I liked this ONE particular part...

"I had no doubt that it would soon become necessary for me to lay down my life for my country.

My father passed away, so I quit college and got a job as an assistant master at a school. I told myself I had found the right sort of work. My guidance and encouragement would raise each pupil to be a leader of the new India.

I started work. I found that the coming exam was much more demanding than the new India. The head master objected if I breathed a single word to the pupils outside grammar and algebra. In a couple of months my enthusiasm had faded away. I became one of those dull individualswho sits and broods when he is at home; who, when working, shoulders his plough with his head bowed, whipped from behind, meekly breaking up earth; content at night to stuff his belly with cattle -fodder; noenergy or enterprise in him at all".

A similar situation that I am facing at work. Let alone bringing a change in the student, managing the documentation of what has 'NOT' been achieved is a big job which I have been doing from past eight months!!!

It's frustrating to be surrounded by students who have been brought up people who do not know what to do with their money, by authorities who assume that their subordinates would anything for an appraisal and money.

Sun, Sand and Star fish

Few images from my previous trip to the beach in Karwar...

Ganesha Immersion

Last week, the whole city of Hyderabad was busy with the Ganesh immersion.

Me and my daughter witnessed the same immersion sight next to our apartment which is surrounded by daily wage workers.

A group of about 6-7 children gathered around carrying a drum made of cardboard box. I did think they were playing something but later I realised that they were all busy in the immersion of the Ganesh they had prepared.

The Ganesh (which was invisible for me though) was placed on a tiny truck which too was built with cardboard boxes. All the children danced and shouted around their truck while pulling the chord which was tied at its end.

Dancing merrily, they brought their idol to an open field filled with shrubs, cleared some place for themselves, dug a hole and happily sent away their GOD.

The whole act was finished in just 10- 15 mins time.

While all the others try to immerse their favourite God with pompous and glory, the children displyed it in their own way.

This incident happened just today in my class.

She is a second grade student- very cute, still filled with baby talk (as she cannot pronounce few letters) and very innocent too.
After she completed her work, I started chatting and pulling her leg saying that you always go down from higher classes the following year. So, I said "you will go to first grade next year".
She kept refusing and at the end she revealed something which made my heart sink. She said 'few of her classmates do ask her to go to first grade again as she does not know the spelling of words'.

This she said casually without any bad feeling which only reflects her innocence.

This is the kind of situation faced by many of the children who have a learning difficulty.
They are not completely accepted by the peers even though a lot of counselling is done by the class teachers.

These children are always looked down as someone who is slow in understanding and cannot match the speed of rest of the class.

This indifferent attitude of peers along with the frustration of not being able to learn brings down the confidence level of the child to a very great extent.

I wish these children could be understood better.

I have been arranging my new book shelf...with old novels, with cute little animal creatures, with some handmade paper 'Thank you' notes (which I received recently).

It's a good feeling to see all my books lined up again. They have their own corner now.
I always wanted to have that cozy corner for my books.

Today being a lazy day, I caught hold of one of my old literature books: The Poet's Pen (a collection of poems by so many versatile poets). I have been flipping through the pages, reading a few poems, reading about poets... Robert Browning, John Donne, Wordsworth, Milton, John Keats almost evrybody's poems can be found in the book. Though my literature quotient has really gone down these days, I liked the feeling of going back to college days and attending literature classes.

A very beautiful temple or rather 'group of temples' that we found accidentally in the old city of Hyderabad. I say group of temples as there are almost 10 to 11 temples which are same as the other with a Shiv ling inside the temple and a Nandi facing the shiv ling.
Here are a few pictures:

Teaching (or learning) Math

I have always been bad with numbers.
Except the basic operations of addition and multiplication all other calculations make me phobic.
Sometimes I even thought if I were dyscalculic (may be in some respect yes!!!).
Though, being with S I have learnt a great deal now.

When I started taking classes for my student 'N' I concentrated mainly on English.
But her mother explained that not only English but Math too was a great area of concern.
She wanted me to teach both the subjects.
Now, I couldn't admit to her that I was so bad in Math especially even at the third grade level.

I decided to give it a try, though I started it much later when she showed some improvement in English.
At present, to my amusement I am not just teaching her Math but I have learnt a great deal while being in that process. (I must thank S too here as he has given me lot of ideas).
I can easily connect one area to another related topic, can prepare a lesson plan and make it interseting.
As for N's mother is concerned, she is very happy that her daughter has shown changes (if not lot yet considerably)in her 'attitude' towards the subject. This attitude change can make a lot of difference. This who once hated the subject likes to learn the same numbers now!

And I am glad that I too changed my attitude from 'NOT teaching MATH' to 'YES I will teach MATH'.

In a day's time

It's true that I was preparing myself to start working (mostly part- time) and I wasn't too serious about it.
But opportunities do knock at the door with or without warning (or even if we want it or not want it).
So did one chance knock at my door and I did went ahead to try my luck.

Like the other usual interviews the assumption was that it would get over very soon, so taking my girl along did not look a bad idea.
But, big institution; big name...everyone is too busy to complete an interview in an hour's time.
The arrangement for the interview would be done once the candidate has arrived; if the higher authority is busy one has to come back again the next day.

Keeping in mind that my dearest husband and daughter were waiting outside I patiently waited for almost two hours.
After those two hours the information was revealed that I had to give a written test and a demo of the class.
By the time these tasks were done it was lunch time. Lunch was generously offered and served. The huge dining hall and the sumptuous food was attractive but was shortlived as the main interview hadn't been done:(

The next round would be after two days, it was declared.

I prepared myself for the next round (more for attending the interview than to win it over as I was least interested). But A fell ill and I aptly refused to attend the interview. Days passed by and waited for their call but after a week's time it was evident they wouldn't call me back. At once I felt bad as I wanted to face it but later was relieved as I was not prepared for a full time job.

My phone did ring again after 15days and they asked me to come again. Getting prepared myself to waste a full day in the lobby of that huge educational institution I went again. It was a very humorous moment for me to sit in the lobby which also accommodates the cashier who collects the so called Fees for Education from parents (not just parents but very rich parents). All the transactions take place in lakhs in the name of providing world class facility (which they do of course).

At the end of three more rounds of interview I was pretty sure that the job was mine. That had not made me happy. I was feeling good that I would be guided by a very senior psychologist but otherwise everything else made me think that I was going there just for the BIG name and the pay they were offering.

Anyone would be happy to work in those conditions, it attracts all. It played its trick on me too. But there is a corner in me which says I would be more contented in a job where the pay is less because they are trying to help someone genuinely without making the education their business. There is dearth of individuals like us in those non-profit organisations but they fail to attract just because they have less money. Guilt prevails me as I think of this but I know I do not belong where I am now. I cannot last long here and I will not last long here.

Summer and the mosquitoes

Sitting on the net they resemble and remind me of the whole lot of pigeons that balance on the electric wires in and around the area of Punjagutta (in Hyd.). Yes, am talking of the mosquitoes of Kondapur against which we need to wage a war everyday. As compared to pigeons which try to balance their bodies on the high tension wires, these mosquitoes sit perfectly on the net at night even when the pressure of the cooler tries to blow them away. They patiently wait for us to keep either our hands or legs very close to the net so that they wouldn't miss out a single drop of blood. By dawn atleast one or two manage to get inside the net to have a feast and cannot move after that because of their gluttony stomach. What surprises me more than these mosquitoes are the people around who manage to sleep at night without a mosquito net. We too tried doing the same but couldn't manage to sleep for a single night. No amount of repellents or fan would keep them away (apart from the whole flat windows having been nailed by meshes). Though the whole area gets really nice breeze in the evening and night, everybody is forced to shut tight the doors because of the blessed creatures. There is one activity which both me and S seem to enjoy because of these mosquitoes is using of the electric racket to kill them. We do get some kind of sadistic pleasure by killing them that way and it is fun to run behind them.

There are times when thoughts rush in the mind- one after the other. They never cease. They need a form of expression, an expression of writing. But the body id too tired to move and give vent to the feelings. It just wants to be put at rest. It is not just fatigue but boredom too which restricts the body from moving and fingers from scribbling.

When the body does want to show some action, the mind does not co-operate. It doesn't want to think the extra-ordinary. It stops the fingers from dodging anything. Thoughts stagnate.

And there are times when both are in perfect tune with each other but the time isn't right. Just like, when I do decide to write and my mind wants to direct and then my daughter decides to wake up from her nap and calls 'Amma':)

I have been reminded of my father's cooking since yesterday.
Every time my mom out somewhere for more than a day or so it would be my father who would cook for me and my sister.
He is a great cook I must tell.
By adding more than the usual 'tadka' and 'masala' he would make very tasty sambar and rasam.
And he was too tired or bored of his own food he would take us to the nearby RamaRao mess (in Davangere) which me and my sister always waited for.

Recently, he even tried cooking Pulav just for himself when mom was out.
So now I know where I get the habit of cooking for ones' own self and not just for others. We need to care for our tummy and our taste buds too:)

Ruins of the Warangal Fort

Fort Warangal















Beautifully carved Ramappa temple at Palampet

Book, Nature, Nostalgia...

Tagore's Omnibus IV still lies on my table only half-read.

I read it every afternoon when A goes to sleep and after I am done with semi-finished household work. No sooner do I read a few lines than it's time for A to get disturbed and wake up.
I hurriedly close the book, run towards her, offer my arms to her to go back to sleep. After 10 mins. when she is back in her dreamy world I stealthily withdraw my hands and resume my position to read again (though with lot of apprehension as to when she will get up next).

Today's read said:"When are you coming down from your three-storeyed building to meet your love (love of nature) under the shade of trees?"

"When are you coming down to meet me on the green grass under the rustling leaves, where you have the freedom of the sky and of sunlight and the tender touch of life's simplicity."

As I read these lines, I stop and recall the days I was in Mysore's University Fine arts campus attending NCC camp (though it was years ago). I have a hazy picture of the whole campus- the rooms we shared, the greenery, the low-lying branches of various trees just outside our room. But what I recollect the most is the way we all slept under the trees after our heavy work out and during lunch break.
The cool breeze would touch our sweaty body only to make us feel cold and soothing. The nap wouldn't last for more than 30 minutes yet it rejuvenated us all for the next session of rigorous parade.

Those were the naps which I will miss forever.

Keladi and Ikkeri

It's a beautiful sight to watch as I travel through the roads of Western Ghats each time: hundred of years old trees withered as compared to the present day 'green plants'. They are worn out and keep collecting dust on the leaves due to constant commuting of vehicles. Yet they stand strong and mighty spreading their branches far and above.

Few pictures of two places our family visited which is sheltered midst these ghats: Rameshwars temple at Keladi and Aghoreshwara temple at Ikkeri both belonging to the Vijayanagar empire era...

Sprawling Mirjan fort

A 15th century fort near Kumta, Karnataka, was a major trading centre of spices especially pepper. It was then ruled by the local chiefs of Vijayanagar kings, but later it was occupied by the Marathas, Hyder Ali and in the end by the British.

Spread across an area of 11.5 acres one can nothing but admire its magnificence with awe and inspiration.

Here are a few pictures: